Here's another great IM Convo. This one is from Saturday afternoon! He was not a bad guy, really, so I changed his name. Be warned there is lots of cussing and general grossness in this entry. I am retarded and don't know how to fix my MT Template so that "More..." shows up when an entry is extended. So for now, just click on the Perma-link thing to read it all. Applications are being accepted to be my personal tech support boy. You will be compensated in cuteness. Oodles of it! But I won't poop on you, so don't ask.

*Update: "More" feature now functioning, Thank You Adam!

bravenew: Would you enjoy using a person as a toilet?
poethelena: I suppose it depends on the person
poethelena: Some deserve it more than others
bravenew: would you do it to someone random who asked?
poethelena: Are you asking? Or are you trying to hook up one of your friends?
bravenew: It's for me. I enjoy it quite a bit, and I think it'd be very enjoyably to have someone intelligent do it.
poethelena: To have someone intelligent poop on you?
poethelena: Or is it #1?
bravenew: #2

poethelena: I don't think I've ever even farted in front of someone.
poethelena: Do you find many intelligent women who are aroused by defecating on others?
bravenew: not yet
poethelena: It's only a matter of time, I suppose.
poethelena: What would you do though, after she was done?
poethelena: That strikes me as one of those awkward moments...
bravenew: consume it
poethelena: Really?
poethelena: I would not have guessed that.
poethelena: Would I have to have a special diet prior to the event?
poethelena: No corn, etc?
bravenew: no, you could eat whatever you would eat otherwise
poethelena: And are you prepared for consuming it? I mean, do you know what to expect?
bravenew: yes
poethelena: I dunno, that's a little much for me.
poethelena: I might have to work up to it.
bravenew: but it does interest you?
poethelena: I find it fascinating.
poethelena: For me to poop on.
bravenew: I mean, would you actually want to work up to iy?
bravenew: it
poethelena: I don't know...it's just bound to be a let down. I mean, where do you go from there?
bravenew: you could videotape it, and use it as blackmail to make me into a 24/7 slave
poethelena: Then I could poop on you all the time.
poethelena: Is there another word I could use? Poop seems to lack something.
bravenew: well, if you don't mind what is technically profanity, shit is always a good one
poethelena: I'll try that.
poethelena: So how long have you been looking for someone to shit on you?
bravenew: I've wanted it since puberty hit, but i only finally got to do it last year. I'm 24.
poethelena: So you have been shit on before...
bravenew: yes
poethelena: I got the impression you were looking for a first-timer because you were one
poethelena: Did you know her well?
poethelena: Was it on purpose?
bravenew: yes, and yes
poethelena: What happened afterwards?
bravenew: life went on as it had before
poethelena: I mean did it make your relationship any different?
poethelena: I might see someone in a new light if I'd shit on them.
poethelena: Maybe I'm getting to personal.
bravenew: it might be natural to respect the waste receptacle less
poethelena: Is that part of the draw for you?
bravenew: that would depend on the situation
poethelena: To be treated as a receptacle?
bravenew: well, it's definitely the feeling more than it is the taste
poethelena: Yeah, I've been meaning to ask about the taste.
poethelena: I mean, it just doesn't seem like something you want to put in your mouth.
bravenew: it is very nassy, but i derive enjoyment from that aspect
poethelena: Have you considered that your opening line might be a little shocking to some?
poethelena: I mean, there's no way to tell from my profile that I like to shit on people
poethelena: You're really pitching one out there
bravenew: yes, but since it is what I am looking for, it is good to get the shock out of the way
bravenew: Why waste an hour talking to someone and then get told off for it?
poethelena: What kind of responses do you usually get?
bravenew: usually, people don't say anything
bravenew: sometimes they are offended and insult me
bravenew: occasionally, they play along and then tell me off
poethelena: That must be disappointing
bravenew: yes
bravenew: is there really a chance that you will do this?
poethelena: Probably not.
bravenew: what if I agreed to wait on you hand and foot for 6 months in return?
poethelena: I can't imagine there is any task I could assign to you as unpleasant as eating my shit.
poethelena: In fact, I think you'd find waiting on me hand and foot to be an additional bonus
poethelena: Would you clean my toilet?
bravenew: yes
poethelena: Would it turn you on?
bravenew: maybe if you forgot to flush
poethelena: I am a little overwhelmed by my housework lately.
poethelena: Is this the only fetish you have?
poethelena: What about feet?
bravenew: if you wanted, i could pay most of your rent, do all of your housework, and sleep on the floor
poethelena: Armpits?
bravenew: i like feet
bravenew: armpits are fun
poethelena: Is that right...you'd do quite a lot for this...
poethelena: but I imagine when the right girl comes along, she'll shit on you without asking for anything in return.
bravenew: i like doing things in return\
bravenew: i'd love to be your 24//7 slave and toilet, and pay your bills
poethelena: An offer almost no girl could resist
poethelena: How would you make money to pay my bills if you were busy being my slave?
poethelena: We'd start to fight
poethelena: I'd be tempted to shit on other people
bravenew: my work would be part of my servitude
bravenew: you could do whatever you wanted with whoever you wanted
poethelena: So you'd be okay with me having multiple partners
poethelena: I'd have to start taking some fiber
bravenew: and we couldnT fight because i'd never disobey you
poethelena: My, but that does sound appealing...
bravenew: and, you could videotape me eating your shit a few times, so that I never could stop paying or disobey you
poethelena: I just can't imagine that the tape breaking would be much of a deterrent to you
poethelena: unless you are a celebrity or politician
poethelena: whose reputation could be damaged
poethelena: let me just say
poethelena: if you are a politician
poethelena: I will be happy to shit on you
bravenew: i would give you the names and addresses of my family and friends so the blackmail was real
poethelena: And that's another thing.
poethelena: When your mom asked me how we met, what would I say?
bravenew: whatever you wanted, but preferably you'd say online
poethelena: Online, where he asked me to poop on him
poethelena: Would she be happy about that?
bravenew: no need to elaborate
bravenew: but i would be your property, so if you wanted to out me, it would be your decision
poethelena: Do your friends know?
bravenew: some
bravenew: do you think you would see me as inferior to you?
poethelena: I think anyone who can be shit on is possessed of something I will never have.
poethelena: I might even respect you.
poethelena: Which of course is not what you have in mind...
poethelena: So there, you see, it would be doomed from the start.
bravenew: no, not really
bravenew: i felt quite empowered when i first did i
bravenew: it
bravenew: it's so hard to find and people think so lowly of it
bravenew: i felt like i was damning convention and beating the odds
poethelena: I can see that
bravenew: I would, however, worship you like a goddess.
poethelena: Well, that goes without saying.
poethelena: I just don't think I have what it takes
poethelena: Maybe if I practice a while
bravenew: I think you do. You're openminded enough. It's not like we have to do it immediately, or every day.
poethelena: That's good, because I don't think I have enough BMs to ensure that one a day will be right for this
poethelena: I just can't believe you would write after reading my profile.
poethelena: I mean, did you see my webpage?
bravenew: yes
poethelena: I'm thinking you would get a kick out of being posted there.
bravenew: where on it?
poethelena: How much did you read?
bravenew: bits and pieces
poethelena: Did you see the IM convo I posted?
bravenew: no
poethelena: Hm
bravenew: i'd prefer not to be posted there
poethelena: But if you're my slave, wouldn't that be my prerogative?
bravenew: yes
poethelena: Would you have written if you'd seen that first?
bravenew: yes
poethelena: You're pretty courageous then
poethelena: Don't worry, I'll change the handle.