So I was suddenly overwhelmed with inspiration to return to my "cataloging" mission with the poetry. I had stopped at 1995. I now have 1996 up for your perusal. That means I'm a scant nine years away from being current with the project!

I don't know that I'd necessarily make any apologies for the material...but re-reading these and thinking this was my head at 16 and 17 years old does make me sad. Some of them I read and they speak to me more now than ever. Old poetry is like a message sent from the You in the past to the You in the future...now if I could just figure out how to go back, and stop that girl from hurting herself so much.

I also recently went through the big box of memories. I found lots of photos and negatives from high school and earlier, photos I thought were all lost. It's been really important to me to go through this process of remembering who I was before any of the bad things happened to me. It also helps to see patterns of behavior, things that have only gotten worse, things that have gotten better.

I know I'm sounding unusually egomaniacal around here lately (isn't there a war, or something?), but a real self-examination was well overdue. I've just been glancing in the mirror on my way out the door, when a good hard look is what I needed.

Maybe you'll enjoy some of the poetry. Maybe you'll read the first two and decide they all suck. Maybe you are in love with me for those sad and wounded qualities found in said poetry, and you will read every word. If the latter is the case, I warn you; you will only love me more when you are through.

It's all here. I suggest No Rules, My Mother, and My Favorite Movie for the quick guide to 1996.