You know, usually this is the happiest time of year for me! But for whatever reason I'm having a really hard time getting into each day. They just kind of go by me. And not in that whipping-past-because-you're-so-busy-way. It's more like the shuffling-past-with-their-heads-down way. I think this week I am going to make a conscious effort to change that. Maybe this "just get over it" method that my mom and Alex are so fond of is worth giving a shot. Time to shove some feelings deep down inside!!

Disappointingly Predictable

I used to look for myself
in everything you wrote.
Each time you mentioned
a radio or an orange peel,
I thought I saw myself there.
But the face always changed
into someone else's.
Another girl
with a different name,
and the jealousy
came up my throat
like a needle and thread
sewing it shut.

That's the kind of woman
I am. Even when I'm
through with you
and I've rejected you
ten thousand times
you still have the power
to drive me crazy.

Just love someone else
and I'm yours.